Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

That awkward moment when you ask a guy “What’s my baby been up to?” and he assumes you’re referring in him when you’re actually asking about his dog…

drvideogames:

please take a good look over our menu

as you can see, our special tonight is the remix to ignition

hot and fresh from the kitchen

(via psychedelictictac)

psychoticmist:

if you ever feel bad about yourself remember that george bush was once informed that 4 brazilian people were killed in iraq and he responded ‘how many is a brazilian’

(via psychedelictictac)

bfoehsho:

• wouldn’t it be great if your name was Molly Connolly
• and you loved Say Anything
• you could go to shows with your ID and be like
• hey look I’m on the set list
• let me in to VIP
• and then when you went backstage you could tell the guys
• hey
• I’m Molly
• …Connolly
• sign this shit before I ruin your life
• and you would all laugh and they would sign your shit
• it would be great

contemplates changing name

sexcake:

i know im ugly but can some guy just take one for the team and love me

(via hauqhty)

revivingpeeta:

tumblr ruined my life but made it better somehow

(Source: ifinnicks, via polarizers)